AGING GRACEFULLY

As Christian women, we know that the Bible says that TRUE BEAUTY is Godliness in a woman and not the fading kind of physical beauty that the world worships.

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. – 1 Peter 3:3-4

THE WORLD IS OBSESSED WITH APPEARANCES.

Growing up, plastic surgery wasn’t as normal as it is today. I remember it being for women who were much older: 60’s+. Today women in their 20’s and 30’s are changing their entire faces and bodies: lip fillers, cheek implants, butt implants, foreheads raised, breasts lifted, chins shaved, etc. It is alarming how many women do not see getting injected, to “enhance their features,” as extreme.

It can be hard to “keep up” with these very filtered and plastic beauty standards. The Kardashians, for example, are widely known for being sex symbols and they have all had lots of work done. They themselves don’t naturally look like they do today. They’ve been sliced and stuffed and sucked and shizled. It is seen as just apart of any kind of beauty regiment for a lot of women.

To be clear, this isn’t a post to put Christian women who age gracefully against any Christian women who do enhance themselves with surgery, makeup, or procedures. The only way these things are a sin issue is if it’s being done for unGodly motives.

I know that the more the Lord has sanctified me, the less I care about my outward appearance – in the sense of keeping up with beauty standards.

I DO KNOW THAT THE LORD DOES NOT WANT US FOCUSING ON FADING BEAUTY BUT ON BEING GODLY WOMEN.

So, what is aging gracefully?

Taking care of our bodies is God honoring. This is something I have severely failed at. A lot of you know I am obese and striving towards losing the weight. Two years ago the Lord really convicted me of my gluttony and my laziness – I haven’t had a binge episode in a LONG time. I praise the Lord for this grace in my life. I am still working…struggling…to lose the weight I gained due to.my sin of having a food idol.

Below is a recent picture of myself and my wonderful husband. He is so funny. But I wanted to be transparent with where I am at weight wise since I am speaking to these issues. Currently I am being held accountable by a dear sister in Christ. I would appreciate prayers for my flesh to be smashed under the fruit of discipline – all by God’s help and strength.

All women want to be attractive. I don’t think that’s a crazy statement. I just need to focus that desire and submit it to Jesus’ Lordship. What does that look like? Well, it definitely looks VERY different than how unbelieving women act and think.

Worldly women want to be SEEN, ADMIRED, & DESIRABLE. They want validation for being physically appealing. They want to be sexy, empowered, and confident. This is seen EVERYWHERE in our culture.

A woman who is a new creation in Jesus has different intentions with her appearance.

WAYS TO HONOR CHRIST WITH OUR BODY AND BEAUTY:

• Making sure my intentions of being physically pretty do not cross into immodesty or impurity.
• Making sure I am focused on being attractive for my husband and his eyes alone. Obviously other people will see me but my intention/desire/goal is to honor my husband with how I dress and appear. His attraction for me is the only attraction I am looking for.
• Doing things that help care for the body: drinking water, using sunscreen, eating well, prioritizing sleep, and moving the body. We definitely weren’t designed to be couch potatoes.
• If we use skincare, which I am a big advocate for, we know that it isn’t to idolize YOUTH but to care for the largest organ we have – our skin!
• We don’t spend time obsessing over wrinkles and crinkles and chin hairs and sunspots. We can use creams to decrease their visibility but we are not hating the fact that we are aging! It’s NATURAL. It’s not something to despise.
• Wearing makeup and fixing our hair should not be done in order to make ourselves the center of attention. Our attention should be on Jesus and what we want others to see in us is GODLINESS.
• We can dye our hair, wear makeup, and tan our skin but again, all these things need to be taken captive and submitted to Christ. What are your true reasons for beautifying yourself? Is it to honor the Lord with your womanhood and what makes us stand out from men: femininity, loveliness? Or is it to be SEEN as beautiful: elevating self and value in appearances? Seek Jesus on this – He knows your heart and is so kind to sanctify us. He will reveal sin in your heart when you seek Him. Be in the Word and prayer on this things.

WHAT HAS GOD SAID?

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. – 2 Corinthians 4:16

Gray hair is a crown of glory; it is gained in a righteous life. – Proverbs 16:31

Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. – Proverbs 31:30

Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, – 1 Timothy 2:9

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people’s bones and all uncleanness.” – Matthew 23:27

For while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come. – 1 Timothy 4:8

Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. – Galatians 5

¹¹ Since all these things are thus to be dissolved, what sort of people ought you to be in lives of holiness and godliness, ¹² waiting for and hastening the coming of the day of God, because of which the heavens will be set on fire and dissolved, and the heavenly bodies will melt as they burn! ¹³ But according to his promise we are waiting for new heavens and a new earth in which righteousness dwells. – 2 Peter 3

For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. – 2 Peter 1:5-8

AGING GRACEFULLY AS A WOMAN IN CHRIST IS TO HAVE YOUR FOCUS ON ACTUAL GRACE

Our physical appearance needs to be at the bottom of the list when it comes to priorities as Christian women.

We need to be zoned in on being in the Word, obeying the Word, being in prayer, discipling – other women and most importantly, our own children, submitting to our husbands, serving others, being a living sacrifice.

We were created for good works in Christ. THIS IS OUR PURPOSE.

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. – Ephesians 2:10

I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. – Romans 12:1

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. – Matthew 6:33

But godliness with contentment is great gain, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. – 1 Timothy 6:6-7

But you, beloved, building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in the love of God, waiting for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ that leads to eternal life. – Jude 1:20-21

¹⁷ But you must remember, beloved, the predictions of the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ. ¹⁸ They said to you, “In the last time there will be scoffers, following their own ungodly passions.” ¹⁹ It is these who cause divisions, worldly people, devoid of the Spirit. ²⁰ But you, beloved, building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit, ²¹ keep yourselves in the love of God, waiting for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ that leads to eternal life. ²² And have mercy on those who doubt; ²³ save others by snatching them out of the fire; to others show mercy with fear, hating even the garment stained by the flesh. – Jude 1

AGING GRACEFULLY ALSO EXTENDS GRACE

One of the most beautiful women I have ever known is PLAIN to the world’s standards. She doesn’t wear makeup or style her hair any trendy ways but she is STUNNING. I look at her and see how gentle, kind, patient, and servant-minded she is. She exudes CHRIST and HIS LOVELINESS. HIS FRUIT. This is just my experience. You may know a Godly woman who is very attractive to the world’s standards, wearing makeup and always in style. The point is that they are RIGHTEOUS women.

Let’s be more quick to see LOVE when we look at others and not be looking for SIN in them. We can be so hasty to see other’s failures of the flesh and not focus on our own. May we look to ourselves! KILL SIN IN OURSELVES. And may we be like Christ and serve others: giving them the Gospel and loving them as image bearers of the Almighty.

One area of grace, in context to this post, is that THROUGH CHRIST we can be rid of jealousy, envy, and bitterness. Let us not look at other women and covet them for their beauty or their style. This does not please God. If these things are in your heart, bring them before Jesus and repent. He will help mature you in His Spirit – to produce GOOD FRUIT, not bad.

FOCUS ON LOVING OTHERS IN TRUTH AND IN CHRIST.

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. – 1 Peter 4:8

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; – 1 Corinthians 13

³ “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? ⁴ How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? ⁵ You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. – Matthew 7

GODLINESS IS OUR GOAL

Since it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.” – 1 Peter 1:16

Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. – Hebrews 12:14

Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work. – 2 Timothy 2:21

For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. ⁶ For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. ⁷ For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God’s law; indeed, it cannot. ⁸ Those who are in the flesh cannot please God.⁹ You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. ¹⁰ But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. ¹¹ If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you. – Romans 8

In conclusion, it’s okay to simply AGE ladies. It’s okay to care for yourself – it honors the Father to be a good steward of our physical bodies. It’s okay to go gray and wrinkly. It is a natural part of living and it means we’re that much closer to being with Jesus for eternity.

May we keep all things under the Lordship of Christ – obeying Him by His Word. We never need fear obeying Him. HIS WAYS ARE ALWAYS RIGHTEOUS.